john,
the best part about being in love with you is knowing that you're the only person left on the planet that could actually hurt me, but being one hundred and eighty-four percent certain that you never EVER will.
i can't imagine my life without you. at least not the future. my past is filled with all sorts of memories that only make me need you that much more. because, you're more than just my best friend... you're shoulder is where my head belongs, and your hand fits mine perfectly, your eyes are the only ones that can see through all my walls and defenses, and your voice is my favorite radio station, your arms were built to keep me safe, and your heart was designed to love me forever.
see? i more that just need you. i want you. i'm sucked in by your gravitational pull. i'm attached, connected, fused, adhered to you. i'm never going anywhere without you ever again. pinky promise.
"if i were a flower growing wild and free all i'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee."
you know how i have bad dreams all the time? i always thought that if i could just find someone who truly loved me, and proved all those mean people from my past wrong, that they would stop. it's taken me a long time to realize that they're never going to stop happening, but they are going to stop hurting me. i don't wake up in the middle of the night terrified anymore, i wake up scared, but immediately set at ease with the thought of you. i know that no matter what happens in my dreams on in real life, you'll be there to make it all go away. just one look at you, one smile, one quiet word of comfort, one kiss, and everything is ok. my world isn't flipped upside down and turned backwards on a giant roller-coaster anymore. you fixed it. you calmed everything down and you made it all right again. you mean everything to me.
i love you. more than anything. more than i can find the words to write, which is impressive since writing is kind of my only way to express anything at all. i love you forever and ever. until the sun stops setting and the waves stop crashing. i love you every second of every minute of every day. i loved you before i even realized it myself, and as shocking and tumultuous of a moment as it was, it was the most comforting moment of my life. i love you from the center of the earth to the farthest star in the heavens [there and back, five thousand times, on foot]. i love you when it's cloudy and sunny and hot and cold and snowy and foggy and windy and rainy and humid and everything in between. i love you with my heart and my head and my soul and my spirit and my body and my conscience and my rational self-awareness. i love you ethically and immorally and without question or trepidation, in the best of times and in the worst of times, under every impossible circumstance. i love you as a six-year-old boy in a power rangers t-shirt, and as an awkward adolescent striving to do what's right, and as a young adult, and as a missionary, and as a college student intent on making the most of his life, and as a priesthood holder who never takes his responsibilities lightly. i love you for who you were, who you are now, and who i know you'll become. i love you without hesitation. i love you in every way i know possible. i love you because you see who i am inside and behind what everyone else sees. i love you because of who i want to become as a result of having met you. i love you for loving me.
i love you. i love you. i love you.
